引子——silentwings的情人節(jié)禮物)
在你決定是否要花上寶貴的幾個(gè)小時(shí)的時(shí)間來(lái)讀這篇文章的時(shí)候，你完全可以參考以下5個(gè)問(wèn)題來(lái)進(jìn)行自我對(duì)照，然后自己決定：
1、寫(xiě)作文寫(xiě)來(lái)寫(xiě)去總是覺(jué)得無(wú)話(huà)可說(shuō)，感覺(jué)就是在湊字?jǐn)?shù)，GRE作文到底寫(xiě)多少字
才算行？
2、寫(xiě)來(lái)寫(xiě)去總是那幾種套路，看得自己也厭倦了，而且詞匯貧乏，用來(lái)用去只是寫(xiě)淺顯初級(jí)詞，GRE詞匯記不起，也不會(huì)活用。
3、作文時(shí)常常發(fā)現(xiàn)論據(jù)論證不足，而且常常發(fā)現(xiàn)脫離了現(xiàn)成提綱就寫(xiě)不下去，有時(shí)還有跑題傾向。
4、不會(huì)寫(xiě)復(fù)雜的長(zhǎng)句，不知道牛人的復(fù)雜精巧的句子結(jié)構(gòu)如何捏成的。
5、時(shí)間緊張，規(guī)定考試時(shí)間下各方面都較平時(shí)練習(xí)時(shí)相差甚遠(yuǎn)，如何解決？
本文旨在以上5個(gè)主要方面闡述GRE作文的入門(mén)修煉和進(jìn)階提高思路，不是系統(tǒng)介紹GRE作文方方面面的攻略，也不是如何教你寫(xiě)出“滿(mǎn)分”的作文，若你有耐性看完的話(huà)，相信你自己就能領(lǐng)悟達(dá)到高分作文的途徑。本文之談均系作者個(gè)人及其余諸位“頂尖實(shí)力”戰(zhàn)友的經(jīng)驗(yàn)總結(jié)，僅供參考，勿將本文用于商業(yè)用途，轉(zhuǎn)載請(qǐng)注明寄托天下出處，并保持主題及文章內(nèi)容完整，嚴(yán)禁私自刪改，尊重著作權(quán)。謝謝大家！
(序曲——Violet遲到的愛(ài)情)
一直以來(lái)都認(rèn)為曾經(jīng)位列中國(guó)10前5位的“槍手”Violet是個(gè)渾身散發(fā)紫羅蘭清香的長(zhǎng)發(fā)女孩，正如我的師傅chimera一樣超塵脫俗，讓人簡(jiǎn)直不敢相信這樣一個(gè)可人的女孩居然是……，但是沉寂了3年后居然讓我在上海邂逅。另我吃驚的不僅僅原來(lái)“她”原來(lái)是個(gè)男的，而且其貌不揚(yáng)，甚至看上去比我(自認(rèn)為是“甲級(jí)殘廢”)還要“那個(gè)”，更另我吃驚的是他會(huì)在他“深?lèi)和唇^”的華東出現(xiàn)，而且居然成為了在閔行外企的白領(lǐng)——負(fù)責(zé)衛(wèi)生清潔的白領(lǐng)。我愣了，我只是認(rèn)為普天之下沒(méi)有比我更會(huì)折磨自己的人，想不到他也算上了，這種“前輩”式的人物。與我異曲同工，自從感情波折后，我就把自己獻(xiàn)給了鐘愛(ài)的“拖拉機(jī)”專(zhuān)業(yè)，整天出入工廠，教室，圖書(shū)館，夢(mèng)想設(shè)計(jì)建造一臺(tái)舉世無(wú)雙的“拖拉機(jī)”，連型號(hào)我都自定義好了——ST120，ST代表SUPER TRACTOR。已不知多少次熟睡中被教室物業(yè)管理人員拋出窗戶(hù)，此刻的他也是有幾次差點(diǎn)在高空作業(yè)時(shí)昏倒。這樣，老板怕他有個(gè)三長(zhǎng)兩短，就將他派往內(nèi)勤。當(dāng)晚，盡管是初次見(jiàn)面，但很快我們都投機(jī)的聊上了，他熱情地請(qǐng)我到他家吃飯。沒(méi)想到的是，喝了點(diǎn)可樂(lè)后，他主動(dòng)跟我說(shuō)他來(lái)上海的原因——為了參加生命中后的一場(chǎng)GRE考試。我嚇了一跳，以為他患了什么“不治之癥”，忙勸他想開(kāi)點(diǎn)。不料他竟然說(shuō)是因?yàn)楦鷆himera一起要今年退休了，所以才破戒來(lái)上海跟她在退休前較量一把，但是結(jié)果一個(gè)女孩的出現(xiàn)改變了他的全盤(pán)計(jì)劃。
“我看見(jiàn)她的時(shí)候，我簡(jiǎn)直呆住了，我反復(fù)問(wèn)自己，“Is she an angel?”我從不相信我一見(jiàn)鐘情，但我有種預(yù)感我愛(ài)她已經(jīng)很多年了，我一直在找，終于從西北找到了華東，找遍了大半個(gè)中國(guó)找到了她。當(dāng)時(shí)她正在人才市場(chǎng)內(nèi)的桌旁為她們公司招聘業(yè)務(wù)員，我情不自禁地上前報(bào)名，與她攀談。結(jié)果我被錄取，因?yàn)槲乙蟮?，而且學(xué)歷一般(西北某不知名大學(xué)畢業(yè)，本科)，有兩年以上工作經(jīng)歷(其實(shí)是以前做“槍手”的掩飾)，還有“基本不會(huì)英語(yǔ)”，這樣不至于要價(jià)高，而且被擔(dān)心因工作突出擠掉上司的“金飯碗”，現(xiàn)在老板就愛(ài)這種吃飯少干活賣(mài)力的“牲口”。后來(lái)，我找準(zhǔn)機(jī)會(huì)表現(xiàn)自己，上升到負(fù)責(zé)清潔總務(wù)，經(jīng)常出入她的辦公室，在閑暇時(shí)與她交談聊天。我盡量不露出馬腳，但是漸漸她發(fā)現(xiàn)我的氣質(zhì)有些與常人不同，好像學(xué)問(wèn)很深，于是她經(jīng)常鼓勵(lì)我應(yīng)該出做一番大事業(yè)。有一天，她讓我去新東方學(xué)英語(yǔ)去。我肚子里好笑，老子英語(yǔ)不能算牛，菜你們應(yīng)該沒(méi)問(wèn)題吧！但是表面上嚴(yán)肅的像塊“鐵板燒”，推脫沒(méi)時(shí)間，工作緊，而且價(jià)錢(qián)不斐。后，她說(shuō)了一句讓我差點(diǎn)有股沖上去抱住她親她一口的沖動(dòng)——“我來(lái)幫你補(bǔ)習(xí)吧！”
就這樣，她每晚都到我家(我租賃的房子，chimera男朋友的，價(jià)格全中國(guó)低)來(lái)幫我補(bǔ)課，周末她還讓我去她家看原版碟學(xué)外語(yǔ)，但是相信我哦，我們什么都沒(méi)有，只是朋友哦……“是的，我相信”我微笑Violet的天真，想不到他原來(lái)感情是這么脆弱，跟我一樣，只停滯在孩子階段。后來(lái)，終于有周末，她忽然問(wèn)我，有沒(méi)有過(guò)女朋友過(guò)，我支吾說(shuō)“沒(méi)有”，后來(lái)我們都沒(méi)有說(shuō)話(huà)。臨走時(shí)，她只把我送到門(mén)口，就停住了，好像有話(huà)說(shuō)，但終于沒(méi)有說(shuō)。我不知道她的用意是什么，回去時(shí)只想假如她來(lái)替ETS出卷，那么我是沒(méi)活路的。第二天，她告訴我說(shuō)她要出差一周，不去補(bǔ)課了，讓我好好想想今后該如何學(xué)下去。一周中，我隱約知道了些什么。她一回來(lái)，我就請(qǐng)她到我家來(lái)吃飯，那天我已經(jīng)鼓足勇氣向她表白，可是我……
“你無(wú)法忘記你初戀女友的影像和話(huà)語(yǔ)？”
是的，我的耳邊一直在響她歇斯底里的哭叫：“我要的是一個(gè)愛(ài)我疼我的男人，不是一個(gè)只懂得考GRE、LSAT的機(jī)器！”我當(dāng)時(shí)真的很亂，完全聽(tīng)不見(jiàn)她對(duì)我說(shuō)話(huà)，我怕有一天她突然發(fā)現(xiàn)我一直在騙她，我根本是個(gè)幫人“作弊”的敗類(lèi)，一個(gè)外語(yǔ)考試的殺手，她會(huì)怎么看我？臨走時(shí)，我和她都站在了門(mén)外半個(gè)小時(shí)，她知道我要說(shuō)給她聽(tīng)，她在以她的耐心等著。后她終于等不了，撒開(kāi)我的手，走了……
“你說(shuō)她，……她走了！你……虧你還算是一代宗師！”
當(dāng)她的背影消失的一剎那我終于忽然明白我苦苦尋找的是什么，什么才是我的真愛(ài)。沒(méi)有立刻猶豫，我立刻把記下的準(zhǔn)考號(hào)扔入了垃圾筒，然后門(mén)也來(lái)不及鎖，就穿了拖鞋忘我的跑了3站路才在第四站上截住她，她看到我連忙下車(chē)。我抱住她，大聲在空曠的“站臺(tái)”上對(duì)她說(shuō)：“親愛(ài)的，你知道嗎，我愛(ài)你！我尋找了整整上半生都在找你。我想和你一起分享全新的生活，因你快樂(lè)而快樂(lè)，因你哀傷而哀傷。我的愛(ài)人，你知道嗎，愛(ài)讓我舍得為你放棄………”
“真替你高興，你終于可以擺脫GRE了，但可惜的是你的獨(dú)樹(shù)一幟的‘五步一殺’的作文絕學(xué)和應(yīng)試秘籍從此要成為絕響了。你其實(shí)可以寫(xiě)本書(shū)?。 ?BR> “絕響的又豈止我一人？何況我背負(fù)了這個(gè)重?fù)?dān)已經(jīng)太累了，我想“絕響”是再好不過(guò)了。畢竟比我出色的高手有的是，他們靠這都出名致富了，我不行，我能告訴別人什么呢？我考過(guò)N次GRE，可是這么多的高分一個(gè)都不屬于自己，出版界會(huì)認(rèn)為我只是瘋子而已。”
“有道理！我估計(jì)馬上您‘女朋友’又要來(lái)補(bǔ)課了，我該走了！我真誠(chéng)地祝福你們！”
“謝謝！我不留你了！你想不想知道那晚她對(duì)我說(shuō)了什么？”
“她……？說(shuō)了什么？”
“愛(ài)我必須把英語(yǔ)學(xué)好哦！”
(我暈!@#$%^&*…………)
離開(kāi)Violet家的時(shí)候，剛好在樓外與一長(zhǎng)發(fā)女子擦肩而過(guò)，直覺(jué)告訴我她就是他的愛(ài)人，因?yàn)樗砩嫌泄勺狭_蘭的香味。真的太羨慕他，終于找到了自己遲到的愛(ài)情，希望他一路走好。也許有一天，我一直夢(mèng)想的，能夠開(kāi)上我自己設(shè)計(jì)的ST——120滿(mǎn)世界去環(huán)游尋找我自己心中的愛(ài)人，那時(shí)一定比什么“寶馬”，“勞斯來(lái)斯”還酷，還要浪漫，當(dāng)清秀明眸，青絲飄灑的女孩羞澀的上前問(wèn)我：
“親愛(ài)的，這是什么？”
“超級(jí)拖拉機(jī)120，世界！”(^-^)
“你怎么會(huì)來(lái)這里？”
“親愛(ài)的，你知道嗎，我愛(ài)你！我尋找了整整上半生都在找你。我想和你一起分享全新的生活，因你快樂(lè)而快樂(lè)，因你哀傷而哀傷。我的愛(ài)人，你知道嗎，愛(ài)讓我舍得為你放棄………”
…………
(2004華東后的戰(zhàn)役)
一、GRE作文整體認(rèn)識(shí)(基礎(chǔ))
GRE作文全稱(chēng)叫Analytical Writing Assessment,我們通常稱(chēng)之為“邏輯寫(xiě)作”，那么首先我們從這里端正一下我們對(duì)其的認(rèn)識(shí)，重心把在“邏輯”(Analytical)之上，即這兩篇作文的性質(zhì)是以“邏輯思想”為中心的，換句話(huà)說(shuō)，也就是“思想第一性”！盡管GRE作文對(duì)語(yǔ)言方面的要求遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)高于其他同類(lèi)考試，如TOEFL，但是不可否認(rèn)的是，語(yǔ)言并不能主要影響你的得分，思想才是關(guān)鍵。我見(jiàn)過(guò)很多考生，語(yǔ)言能力通過(guò)反復(fù)練習(xí)，借鑒和背誦，達(dá)到了相當(dāng)高的水平，但是寫(xiě)出來(lái)的東西是“成人思想嬰兒化”的東西，膚淺無(wú)深度，后連qualify的級(jí)別都達(dá)不到，就是一開(kāi)始重心把偏的緣故。好，意識(shí)到了這點(diǎn)，我們開(kāi)始具體分析如何操練GRE作文。在以下的分析中，我將重點(diǎn)剖析大家普遍較難掌握的ISSUE類(lèi)作文大講特講，而對(duì)ARGUMENT只是在幾個(gè)關(guān)鍵的須糾正常識(shí)錯(cuò)誤的地方帶一下即可。Are you ready? Let's go!!!
二、GRE作文的要求(根本)
無(wú)論是ISSUE還是ARGUMENT在評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)上都有共同之處，考察之后，不難發(fā)現(xiàn)，都要求：第一，觀點(diǎn)有深度，例證有說(shuō)服力；第二，組織有條理；第三，表達(dá)清晰準(zhǔn)確；第四，語(yǔ)言流利，句式復(fù)雜，詞匯豐富；第五，語(yǔ)言地道標(biāo)準(zhǔn)；第六，少有輕微錯(cuò)誤?？梢哉f(shuō)，這六條標(biāo)準(zhǔn)就是6個(gè)評(píng)分段，大家平時(shí)在練習(xí)時(shí)，可以參照這六條給自己大分，同時(shí)我們可以看到，關(guān)于語(yǔ)言要求的內(nèi)容都在“末三條”，可見(jiàn)其地位較“思想邏輯及條理性”可退居其次，從而印證了上述結(jié)論。第一條說(shuō)的是“思想性”，第二條說(shuō)的是“結(jié)構(gòu)性”，第三條說(shuō)的是“表達(dá)性”，從這里入手，我們就分別采取“各個(gè)擊破”的方法解剖GRE作文的本質(zhì)。
三、GRE作文的思想性(第一性)
原則一：準(zhǔn)確審題，全面回應(yīng)
很多考生往往對(duì)關(guān)乎自己作文命運(yùn)關(guān)鍵的部分卻不屑一顧，結(jié)果往往“下筆數(shù)百字，離題十萬(wàn)里”。時(shí)間對(duì)于考生來(lái)說(shuō)的的確確是個(gè)不可不考慮的重要環(huán)節(jié)，但是審題是一種好的“習(xí)慣”，是對(duì)應(yīng)試者基本素質(zhì)的考驗(yàn)，馬虎不得。后面我們會(huì)提到如何作文，就是如何“借題發(fā)揮”，如何“點(diǎn)到為止”，不經(jīng)過(guò)這道工序，是不可能“功成身退”的。之所以如此關(guān)注強(qiáng)調(diào)這點(diǎn)，一方面是因?yàn)橐坏芭茴}”(主要是在ISSUE中)，將接受ETSsevere的懲罰，被叛“0”分，同時(shí)也是因?yàn)檫@種現(xiàn)象很普遍，比如下面一篇來(lái)自網(wǎng)上的ISSUE作文就出現(xiàn)了這種“癥狀”。
注：病歷文章來(lái)自猴哥滿(mǎn)分網(wǎng)，范文主要就所討論之處作出示范，并非一定是什么“高分作文”，主要是silentwings的文章，所選話(huà)題均來(lái)自近半年來(lái)筆者等人在華東區(qū)考場(chǎng)實(shí)戰(zhàn)真題。
29."Public figures such as actors, politicians, and athletes should expect people to be interested in their private lives. When they seek a public role, they should expect that they will lose at least some of their privacy."
(病歷文)
Everyone has the right to keep his/her privacy, including the public figures. People have the nature to learn others' privacy, especially those of the celebrities for various reasons, such as reverance and curiousness, but it doesn't follow that they are entitled to pry others' private life, and it is really unfair to say that any public figure choose to expose his/her privacy by himself/herself as long as he/she seek a public role.
In the current days, it is a widely spread atmosphere that people take a strong interest in talking about the private life of celebrities, they even rival each other in the fact that who knows more about a common interested celebrity. To cater such a taste, more and more mass media try their best to collect each aspect of a public figure's private life with an interest even exceeding that of making known their work. When we read a entertainment paper or magazine, we are certain to find that most of the content are the private life of singers and stars, such as someone got a divorce with his/her ex-girlfried/ex-boyfriend and is now keeping contract with someone else, etc.
All that exists is not valid, we couldn't say that it is in reason to spy into others' privacy just because most people prefer to do so, and we should not just accept a unfair fact without exert any effort to change the circumstance. To put your own feet in the shoes of the public figures, do you feel comfortable to be watched everywhere you go, and find a lot of affair news about you in the media especially when most of the news are made out by the pressmen? If your answer to this question is no, you should agree that we are obliged to do something to change the current situation about the private lift of public figures. Special laws should be enacted to discipline the prying into privacy of the mass media, sound should be heared arguing again people's interest in celebrities' private life.
Only when the public figures are librated from the harassment of worrying about their privacy's protection, we can expect a better service from them, and in that case, more capable people will be attract to pursue a public role. Suppose that if a singer is followed everywhere he/she goes, how can he/she lead a normal life as common people, how can he/she gets a relaxation? He/she must be cautious when he/she every words, he/she can't expect a casual and relaxing atmosphere as every common people can enjoy. It is difficult for him/her to concentrate all their energy in working, as a consequence, we would lose some more brilliant performance we can expect otherwise.
In summary, we should call on the public to cease to spy into the celebrities' privacy and pay more attention to their public life, only in that way can the public figure enjoy their life better and can we expect a better service from them. (496 words)
評(píng)析：這篇文章的主要失誤來(lái)自作者未能仔細(xì)審題便下筆一蹴而就，題目所討論的對(duì)象明明是Public Figures,從頭到尾討論的主體居然成了Public，說(shuō)他們?nèi)绾稳绾侮P(guān)注明星隱私，說(shuō)他們?nèi)绾稳绾卧O(shè)身處地地為明星們著想，后總結(jié)說(shuō)是公眾應(yīng)還明星們于自由之軀，把一上來(lái)合理的“否定回應(yīng)”拋之腦后，從而導(dǎo)致文章“答非所問(wèn)”。考慮到文章一上來(lái)合理回應(yīng)，以及不錯(cuò)的語(yǔ)言表達(dá)，僅有幾處不起眼的拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤，應(yīng)判為“2分”(有嚴(yán)重錯(cuò)誤類(lèi)文章)。
在出示范文之前，我們就此題談?wù)劇皩忣}”和“回應(yīng)”這兩個(gè)基本問(wèn)題。
(1)審題的原則：“字斟句酌，明確對(duì)象”，我們讀題就是要弄懂題目要讓我們干什么，然后才能相應(yīng)知道該怎么干。GRE作文都是議論文，寫(xiě)議論文就好比“打仗”，知己知彼方能百戰(zhàn)不殆。這個(gè)題目不難讀懂，先翻譯如下：“公眾人物，例如演員、政治家和運(yùn)動(dòng)員等應(yīng)該預(yù)料到人們對(duì)他們私生活的關(guān)注。當(dāng)他們決定成為公眾角色時(shí)，他們應(yīng)該料到自己的一些隱私將被供之于眾?！憋@然，經(jīng)過(guò)審題，我們發(fā)現(xiàn)題目探討的是公眾人物“是否應(yīng)該”預(yù)料到自己隱私的暴光。話(huà)題將討論設(shè)定在這個(gè)范圍內(nèi)，同時(shí)給出了一個(gè)參考的見(jiàn)解，“他們當(dāng)然應(yīng)該知道”，并給出理由，“他們自己決定成為公眾人物”。整個(gè)話(huà)題是個(gè)“should”類(lèi)型的ISSUE(詳細(xì)分類(lèi)見(jiàn)后文)，前后句呈”因果關(guān)系“(執(zhí)果索因)。這才是完整的審題，才是完整正確把握文章的第一步。
(2)回應(yīng)的原則：“攻其一點(diǎn)，兼顧其余”。也就是說(shuō)，回應(yīng)要找準(zhǔn)重點(diǎn)，其余部分只須略微帶過(guò)，作到“回應(yīng)重點(diǎn)突出而全面”，這點(diǎn)在ISSUE和“ARGUMENT”中都是普遍適用的大前提原則，也是“高分作文”的要領(lǐng)之一。這里我們已經(jīng)知道作這篇文章要從“公眾人物”自身出發(fā)，以他們的角度來(lái)看待自己隱私是否該暴光的問(wèn)題，這樣我們就找到中心回應(yīng)點(diǎn)是“should expect”,對(duì)象是“public figures”,而例證可以充分利用話(huà)題的友好提示：列舉的三種人，選擇熟悉易于表達(dá)的來(lái)充實(shí)論證，免了自己的勞神工夫，這種資源一定要善加利用，一方面可充實(shí)論據(jù)，另一方面，作到了兼顧其他，全面回應(yīng)的原則。下面的范文采取AGREE的態(tài)度，采用should類(lèi)文章的清晰“套路”，作到了合理回應(yīng)，請(qǐng)讀者就這方面仔細(xì)分析。
(范文)
A million times I have heard the accident regarding a certain famous star shouted to separate fervid journalists and interviews from various media outside his or her door, which finally results a farce of quarrel and fight. Sometimes I really hate those drab reporters, who surprisingly have the endless power and fresh tricks to snatch almost each shadow of celebrities together with the innate ability to embellish them so "fascinating". At the same time those public figures shriek for their overexposure of privacy I am always pity for their embarrassment, for their career they really have no better choice but to tolerate, for their legitimate rights they had better struggle against the privacy revelation. But most of them, in the end, choose the former despite without any mustered negotiation.
It is obvious to take into mind that being a public cynosure the first thing one has to be even eager to sacrifice is the privacy, in that the quality of public is just the opposite of privacy, in the rim of relationship, either one can only be maintained. The fundamental aim for a celebrity is to stand strong in the sight of public and win over the precious approbation from his or her fans. So packing oneself in his single world can help nothing to add his reputation, what he strives to do is the reverse-anatomize oneself in front of the public stares and acclaim for his names being praised or criticized in the sun-then can he make himself known out of the nonplus of being forgotten and lose his prestige in public. As a result, the condition of privacy being traced and published is no more a paramount incidence but under the prediction of them; after all, no reports, no celebrities.
Hence, if a public figure intends to preserve his title, no grouch he ought to hang at lips, on the contrary, he might be thankful to these indefatigable journalists and reporters for their free propaganda of his talk and behavior pattern. Take the teenage star-backstreet boys for instance; with the sales of their albums skyrocket, their reputation is more and more stentorian, following the trend of their ordinary life becoming an incandescent focus attracting public eyes. Then as we all know, backstreet clothes have been prevalent, backstreet sneakers also is in heat sale, and personal parlance begins to appear some exotic features commonly shared by teenagers just because backstreet boys ever talked like that. A five-boy chorus can influence so many groups of people by what they said and what they did, the feeling of satisfaction and proud could be no better to describe their elation of success than for the byproducts of the privacy publicized, this time they probably even couldn't help to rush up to the media reporters and proffer their kisses.
Oh, well, to the scandals mostly reported in any entertainment channel, these figures ultimately reaches a top limitation of inured tolerance, especially those survive by their shingles of excellent prestige, such as those politicians. In the period of election of presidents or senators, the most headache those participants suffer is the side report, which has the overwhelming clout to remove his precious stake to his adversary's side. Then the only thing they must remember is the discretion of their words and behaviors either in public case or merely in private room. There is no absolute stalwart wall that can resist the strong blast, and the unique paper that can wrap the burning flame. According to this principle, the expectation for their privacy no longer staying for himself is no doubt fathomable to them, astonishment is just an effete struggle.
To sum up, being an illustrious man have to pay his privacy for the undertaking brilliance, and he should understand without the public desire to delve their everyday life instead of merely relying on their limited published works, they convincingly cannot earn such a lot from their maniac supporters, who also need them to care for and give enough regards as feedback. Once this complex relationship being disentangled, I think, the public figures and populace will make a balance on the scale of privacy revelation. (690 words)
在切實(shí)掌握好這些技巧之后，后續(xù)的問(wèn)題也會(huì)接踵而來(lái)，很多考生在認(rèn)識(shí)到問(wèn)題的嚴(yán)重性之后，不知道如何從開(kāi)始回應(yīng)起就把握好文章的走向而不跑題，作好條理性的框架是必須的，但是簡(jiǎn)便的方法就是(千萬(wàn)注意啊?。?！)——將話(huà)題的內(nèi)容編成問(wèn)句，自己的每段回應(yīng)編成回答，如果作到有問(wèn)必答，那么你就沒(méi)有跑題，否則就要重新構(gòu)思回到正軌上來(lái)。這個(gè)方法在備考初期研究題庫(kù)預(yù)先構(gòu)思時(shí)尤為重要，他能檢驗(yàn)?zāi)闾峋V的合理性，否則一旦到了考場(chǎng)，你來(lái)不及重新構(gòu)思而盲目照搬，后果不堪設(shè)想。希望這里的這點(diǎn)提醒能夠引起各位考生足夠的重視，不要白白無(wú)謂犧牲。
而這個(gè)問(wèn)題對(duì)于ARGUMENT來(lái)說(shuō)，情況要好得多，一方面由于ARGUMENT回應(yīng)方式比較固定且其較ISSUE來(lái)說(shuō)約定俗成的高度模式化，另一方面是由于ARGUMENT的易于操作性和熟悉性，利用的資源都來(lái)自題干本身，因而考生在這篇作文上很少看走眼。但是也有些題目，由于脫胎于ETS慣常的邏輯單題模式，本身語(yǔ)言饒口，且容易將論據(jù)與結(jié)論混淆，從而導(dǎo)致一定程度的攻擊失誤，雖然不至于像ISSUE那樣導(dǎo)致全盤(pán)失誤，但是畢竟在好拿分的項(xiàng)目上失分無(wú)疑是給原本脆弱的分?jǐn)?shù)雪上加霜。下面我們看一道在去年年末左右華東考場(chǎng)遇到的一道少見(jiàn)的ARGUMENT難題，難就難在對(duì)于論據(jù)和結(jié)論的辯識(shí)和推理上，還有就是邏輯謬誤不是像其他題目那樣明顯地向你揮手——“向我開(kāi)炮！??！”
142.The article entitled 'Eating Iron' in last month's issue of Eating for Health reported that a recent study found a correlation between high levels of iron in the diet and an increased risk of heart disease. Further, it is well established that there is a link between large amounts of red meat in the diet and heart disease, and red meat is high in iron. On the basis of the study and the well-established link between red meat and heart disease, we can conclude that the correlation between high iron levels and heart disease, then, is most probably a function of the correlation between red meat and heart disease.
析題：仔細(xì)讀過(guò)，發(fā)現(xiàn)這道題有點(diǎn)繞，很多考生曾經(jīng)有過(guò)這樣的困惑：“我沒(méi)有理解后一句話(huà)的意思is most probably a function of the correlation between red meat and heart disease.是說(shuō)high iron level于heart disease之間的關(guān)系是red meat與heart disease之間有關(guān)的結(jié)果那作者到底是認(rèn)為high iron level和heart disease之間有沒(méi)有關(guān)系阿？”再讀之下，我們會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)作者其實(shí)做了一個(gè)順接推論：red meat引起心臟病------------> red meat里面還有大量的鐵------------------> 高鐵引起心臟病，就是這么一個(gè)簡(jiǎn)單的推論過(guò)程，關(guān)鍵認(rèn)清誰(shuí)推出誰(shuí)，就要在審題時(shí)注意到關(guān)鍵的這么看似不經(jīng)意卻被友好的ETS“重復(fù)兩次”的短語(yǔ)“well established”，也就是說(shuō)“大量紅肉與心臟病之間一定有聯(lián)系”是不容質(zhì)疑的論據(jù)，即本題論據(jù)是不容批駁的，關(guān)鍵問(wèn)題在于由論據(jù)推導(dǎo)出結(jié)論的時(shí)候犯了“Implicit causal claims”和“gratuitous assumptions”(詳細(xì)邏輯謬誤分類(lèi)見(jiàn)后文“七宗罪”)，因而我們就可以以次展開(kāi)攻擊。很多來(lái)自網(wǎng)上的文章和提綱在本題上顛倒了推導(dǎo)對(duì)象，把“高鐵引起心臟病”作為論據(jù)來(lái)推出“red meat引起心臟病”，結(jié)果導(dǎo)致文章失誤。下面讀者可通過(guò)以下范文檢驗(yàn)一下該論證過(guò)程和思路：
(范文)
The correlation of the high irons level and heart disease the arguer trying to prove is not as perfect as he assumes. Although at first glance, his cause-and-effect analysis seems quite cogent, yet it can't stand much reexamination.
I agree to the well-established theory concerning the necessary relation between the large amount of red meat in people's diet and heart disease, but no other possibilities can be ruled out except for one of the ingredients-iron. It is obvious that the arguer constructs his building of conclusion on the basis of the conviction of the deleterious function stems from the iron. While not only a single iron does red meat contain, as we all know, many other components also have the influential role once being indigested into human body. For instance, some type of particular protein it might include, instead of the iron, is the substantial root of heart attack. So the arguer's peroration has no convincing power for this gratuitous assumption.
Moreover, even though his deduction does really derive from some passage of authoritative researches he has no opportunity to list below, the assertion about the high levels of iron related to the possibility of heart disease cannot be got through by merely so qualified the evidence exhibited here. According to the arguer's elicitation, we believe the red meat does contain large amount of iron, however, we might ask ourselves such questions enlightened by our common sense, "Does the amount of iron involved in red meat reach the dangerous level enough to lead to heart disease?" The answer we can't obtain through this short argument, thus directly make us doubt the whole fruits the arguer attained.
As it stands, the study reported on the published media Eating for Health is inevitable filled with some lethal logic fallacies, which finally weakens the cogency of the whole claims. To such a paramount and sensitive issue relative to people's health and life, scrutiny is not allowed to be neglected; and it is just for this point, I'm afraid, no people could ultimately abjure for eating red meat as a result of reading this ridiculous article. (352 words)
在你決定是否要花上寶貴的幾個(gè)小時(shí)的時(shí)間來(lái)讀這篇文章的時(shí)候，你完全可以參考以下5個(gè)問(wèn)題來(lái)進(jìn)行自我對(duì)照，然后自己決定：
1、寫(xiě)作文寫(xiě)來(lái)寫(xiě)去總是覺(jué)得無(wú)話(huà)可說(shuō)，感覺(jué)就是在湊字?jǐn)?shù)，GRE作文到底寫(xiě)多少字
才算行？
2、寫(xiě)來(lái)寫(xiě)去總是那幾種套路，看得自己也厭倦了，而且詞匯貧乏，用來(lái)用去只是寫(xiě)淺顯初級(jí)詞，GRE詞匯記不起，也不會(huì)活用。
3、作文時(shí)常常發(fā)現(xiàn)論據(jù)論證不足，而且常常發(fā)現(xiàn)脫離了現(xiàn)成提綱就寫(xiě)不下去，有時(shí)還有跑題傾向。
4、不會(huì)寫(xiě)復(fù)雜的長(zhǎng)句，不知道牛人的復(fù)雜精巧的句子結(jié)構(gòu)如何捏成的。
5、時(shí)間緊張，規(guī)定考試時(shí)間下各方面都較平時(shí)練習(xí)時(shí)相差甚遠(yuǎn)，如何解決？
本文旨在以上5個(gè)主要方面闡述GRE作文的入門(mén)修煉和進(jìn)階提高思路，不是系統(tǒng)介紹GRE作文方方面面的攻略，也不是如何教你寫(xiě)出“滿(mǎn)分”的作文，若你有耐性看完的話(huà)，相信你自己就能領(lǐng)悟達(dá)到高分作文的途徑。本文之談均系作者個(gè)人及其余諸位“頂尖實(shí)力”戰(zhàn)友的經(jīng)驗(yàn)總結(jié)，僅供參考，勿將本文用于商業(yè)用途，轉(zhuǎn)載請(qǐng)注明寄托天下出處，并保持主題及文章內(nèi)容完整，嚴(yán)禁私自刪改，尊重著作權(quán)。謝謝大家！
(序曲——Violet遲到的愛(ài)情)
一直以來(lái)都認(rèn)為曾經(jīng)位列中國(guó)10前5位的“槍手”Violet是個(gè)渾身散發(fā)紫羅蘭清香的長(zhǎng)發(fā)女孩，正如我的師傅chimera一樣超塵脫俗，讓人簡(jiǎn)直不敢相信這樣一個(gè)可人的女孩居然是……，但是沉寂了3年后居然讓我在上海邂逅。另我吃驚的不僅僅原來(lái)“她”原來(lái)是個(gè)男的，而且其貌不揚(yáng)，甚至看上去比我(自認(rèn)為是“甲級(jí)殘廢”)還要“那個(gè)”，更另我吃驚的是他會(huì)在他“深?lèi)和唇^”的華東出現(xiàn)，而且居然成為了在閔行外企的白領(lǐng)——負(fù)責(zé)衛(wèi)生清潔的白領(lǐng)。我愣了，我只是認(rèn)為普天之下沒(méi)有比我更會(huì)折磨自己的人，想不到他也算上了，這種“前輩”式的人物。與我異曲同工，自從感情波折后，我就把自己獻(xiàn)給了鐘愛(ài)的“拖拉機(jī)”專(zhuān)業(yè)，整天出入工廠，教室，圖書(shū)館，夢(mèng)想設(shè)計(jì)建造一臺(tái)舉世無(wú)雙的“拖拉機(jī)”，連型號(hào)我都自定義好了——ST120，ST代表SUPER TRACTOR。已不知多少次熟睡中被教室物業(yè)管理人員拋出窗戶(hù)，此刻的他也是有幾次差點(diǎn)在高空作業(yè)時(shí)昏倒。這樣，老板怕他有個(gè)三長(zhǎng)兩短，就將他派往內(nèi)勤。當(dāng)晚，盡管是初次見(jiàn)面，但很快我們都投機(jī)的聊上了，他熱情地請(qǐng)我到他家吃飯。沒(méi)想到的是，喝了點(diǎn)可樂(lè)后，他主動(dòng)跟我說(shuō)他來(lái)上海的原因——為了參加生命中后的一場(chǎng)GRE考試。我嚇了一跳，以為他患了什么“不治之癥”，忙勸他想開(kāi)點(diǎn)。不料他竟然說(shuō)是因?yàn)楦鷆himera一起要今年退休了，所以才破戒來(lái)上海跟她在退休前較量一把，但是結(jié)果一個(gè)女孩的出現(xiàn)改變了他的全盤(pán)計(jì)劃。
“我看見(jiàn)她的時(shí)候，我簡(jiǎn)直呆住了，我反復(fù)問(wèn)自己，“Is she an angel?”我從不相信我一見(jiàn)鐘情，但我有種預(yù)感我愛(ài)她已經(jīng)很多年了，我一直在找，終于從西北找到了華東，找遍了大半個(gè)中國(guó)找到了她。當(dāng)時(shí)她正在人才市場(chǎng)內(nèi)的桌旁為她們公司招聘業(yè)務(wù)員，我情不自禁地上前報(bào)名，與她攀談。結(jié)果我被錄取，因?yàn)槲乙蟮?，而且學(xué)歷一般(西北某不知名大學(xué)畢業(yè)，本科)，有兩年以上工作經(jīng)歷(其實(shí)是以前做“槍手”的掩飾)，還有“基本不會(huì)英語(yǔ)”，這樣不至于要價(jià)高，而且被擔(dān)心因工作突出擠掉上司的“金飯碗”，現(xiàn)在老板就愛(ài)這種吃飯少干活賣(mài)力的“牲口”。后來(lái)，我找準(zhǔn)機(jī)會(huì)表現(xiàn)自己，上升到負(fù)責(zé)清潔總務(wù)，經(jīng)常出入她的辦公室，在閑暇時(shí)與她交談聊天。我盡量不露出馬腳，但是漸漸她發(fā)現(xiàn)我的氣質(zhì)有些與常人不同，好像學(xué)問(wèn)很深，于是她經(jīng)常鼓勵(lì)我應(yīng)該出做一番大事業(yè)。有一天，她讓我去新東方學(xué)英語(yǔ)去。我肚子里好笑，老子英語(yǔ)不能算牛，菜你們應(yīng)該沒(méi)問(wèn)題吧！但是表面上嚴(yán)肅的像塊“鐵板燒”，推脫沒(méi)時(shí)間，工作緊，而且價(jià)錢(qián)不斐。后，她說(shuō)了一句讓我差點(diǎn)有股沖上去抱住她親她一口的沖動(dòng)——“我來(lái)幫你補(bǔ)習(xí)吧！”
就這樣，她每晚都到我家(我租賃的房子，chimera男朋友的，價(jià)格全中國(guó)低)來(lái)幫我補(bǔ)課，周末她還讓我去她家看原版碟學(xué)外語(yǔ)，但是相信我哦，我們什么都沒(méi)有，只是朋友哦……“是的，我相信”我微笑Violet的天真，想不到他原來(lái)感情是這么脆弱，跟我一樣，只停滯在孩子階段。后來(lái)，終于有周末，她忽然問(wèn)我，有沒(méi)有過(guò)女朋友過(guò)，我支吾說(shuō)“沒(méi)有”，后來(lái)我們都沒(méi)有說(shuō)話(huà)。臨走時(shí)，她只把我送到門(mén)口，就停住了，好像有話(huà)說(shuō)，但終于沒(méi)有說(shuō)。我不知道她的用意是什么，回去時(shí)只想假如她來(lái)替ETS出卷，那么我是沒(méi)活路的。第二天，她告訴我說(shuō)她要出差一周，不去補(bǔ)課了，讓我好好想想今后該如何學(xué)下去。一周中，我隱約知道了些什么。她一回來(lái)，我就請(qǐng)她到我家來(lái)吃飯，那天我已經(jīng)鼓足勇氣向她表白，可是我……
“你無(wú)法忘記你初戀女友的影像和話(huà)語(yǔ)？”
是的，我的耳邊一直在響她歇斯底里的哭叫：“我要的是一個(gè)愛(ài)我疼我的男人，不是一個(gè)只懂得考GRE、LSAT的機(jī)器！”我當(dāng)時(shí)真的很亂，完全聽(tīng)不見(jiàn)她對(duì)我說(shuō)話(huà)，我怕有一天她突然發(fā)現(xiàn)我一直在騙她，我根本是個(gè)幫人“作弊”的敗類(lèi)，一個(gè)外語(yǔ)考試的殺手，她會(huì)怎么看我？臨走時(shí)，我和她都站在了門(mén)外半個(gè)小時(shí)，她知道我要說(shuō)給她聽(tīng)，她在以她的耐心等著。后她終于等不了，撒開(kāi)我的手，走了……
“你說(shuō)她，……她走了！你……虧你還算是一代宗師！”
當(dāng)她的背影消失的一剎那我終于忽然明白我苦苦尋找的是什么，什么才是我的真愛(ài)。沒(méi)有立刻猶豫，我立刻把記下的準(zhǔn)考號(hào)扔入了垃圾筒，然后門(mén)也來(lái)不及鎖，就穿了拖鞋忘我的跑了3站路才在第四站上截住她，她看到我連忙下車(chē)。我抱住她，大聲在空曠的“站臺(tái)”上對(duì)她說(shuō)：“親愛(ài)的，你知道嗎，我愛(ài)你！我尋找了整整上半生都在找你。我想和你一起分享全新的生活，因你快樂(lè)而快樂(lè)，因你哀傷而哀傷。我的愛(ài)人，你知道嗎，愛(ài)讓我舍得為你放棄………”
“真替你高興，你終于可以擺脫GRE了，但可惜的是你的獨(dú)樹(shù)一幟的‘五步一殺’的作文絕學(xué)和應(yīng)試秘籍從此要成為絕響了。你其實(shí)可以寫(xiě)本書(shū)?。 ?BR> “絕響的又豈止我一人？何況我背負(fù)了這個(gè)重?fù)?dān)已經(jīng)太累了，我想“絕響”是再好不過(guò)了。畢竟比我出色的高手有的是，他們靠這都出名致富了，我不行，我能告訴別人什么呢？我考過(guò)N次GRE，可是這么多的高分一個(gè)都不屬于自己，出版界會(huì)認(rèn)為我只是瘋子而已。”
“有道理！我估計(jì)馬上您‘女朋友’又要來(lái)補(bǔ)課了，我該走了！我真誠(chéng)地祝福你們！”
“謝謝！我不留你了！你想不想知道那晚她對(duì)我說(shuō)了什么？”
“她……？說(shuō)了什么？”
“愛(ài)我必須把英語(yǔ)學(xué)好哦！”
(我暈!@#$%^&*…………)
離開(kāi)Violet家的時(shí)候，剛好在樓外與一長(zhǎng)發(fā)女子擦肩而過(guò)，直覺(jué)告訴我她就是他的愛(ài)人，因?yàn)樗砩嫌泄勺狭_蘭的香味。真的太羨慕他，終于找到了自己遲到的愛(ài)情，希望他一路走好。也許有一天，我一直夢(mèng)想的，能夠開(kāi)上我自己設(shè)計(jì)的ST——120滿(mǎn)世界去環(huán)游尋找我自己心中的愛(ài)人，那時(shí)一定比什么“寶馬”，“勞斯來(lái)斯”還酷，還要浪漫，當(dāng)清秀明眸，青絲飄灑的女孩羞澀的上前問(wèn)我：
“親愛(ài)的，這是什么？”
“超級(jí)拖拉機(jī)120，世界！”(^-^)
“你怎么會(huì)來(lái)這里？”
“親愛(ài)的，你知道嗎，我愛(ài)你！我尋找了整整上半生都在找你。我想和你一起分享全新的生活，因你快樂(lè)而快樂(lè)，因你哀傷而哀傷。我的愛(ài)人，你知道嗎，愛(ài)讓我舍得為你放棄………”
…………
(2004華東后的戰(zhàn)役)
一、GRE作文整體認(rèn)識(shí)(基礎(chǔ))
GRE作文全稱(chēng)叫Analytical Writing Assessment,我們通常稱(chēng)之為“邏輯寫(xiě)作”，那么首先我們從這里端正一下我們對(duì)其的認(rèn)識(shí)，重心把在“邏輯”(Analytical)之上，即這兩篇作文的性質(zhì)是以“邏輯思想”為中心的，換句話(huà)說(shuō)，也就是“思想第一性”！盡管GRE作文對(duì)語(yǔ)言方面的要求遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)高于其他同類(lèi)考試，如TOEFL，但是不可否認(rèn)的是，語(yǔ)言并不能主要影響你的得分，思想才是關(guān)鍵。我見(jiàn)過(guò)很多考生，語(yǔ)言能力通過(guò)反復(fù)練習(xí)，借鑒和背誦，達(dá)到了相當(dāng)高的水平，但是寫(xiě)出來(lái)的東西是“成人思想嬰兒化”的東西，膚淺無(wú)深度，后連qualify的級(jí)別都達(dá)不到，就是一開(kāi)始重心把偏的緣故。好，意識(shí)到了這點(diǎn)，我們開(kāi)始具體分析如何操練GRE作文。在以下的分析中，我將重點(diǎn)剖析大家普遍較難掌握的ISSUE類(lèi)作文大講特講，而對(duì)ARGUMENT只是在幾個(gè)關(guān)鍵的須糾正常識(shí)錯(cuò)誤的地方帶一下即可。Are you ready? Let's go!!!
二、GRE作文的要求(根本)
無(wú)論是ISSUE還是ARGUMENT在評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)上都有共同之處，考察之后，不難發(fā)現(xiàn)，都要求：第一，觀點(diǎn)有深度，例證有說(shuō)服力；第二，組織有條理；第三，表達(dá)清晰準(zhǔn)確；第四，語(yǔ)言流利，句式復(fù)雜，詞匯豐富；第五，語(yǔ)言地道標(biāo)準(zhǔn)；第六，少有輕微錯(cuò)誤?？梢哉f(shuō)，這六條標(biāo)準(zhǔn)就是6個(gè)評(píng)分段，大家平時(shí)在練習(xí)時(shí)，可以參照這六條給自己大分，同時(shí)我們可以看到，關(guān)于語(yǔ)言要求的內(nèi)容都在“末三條”，可見(jiàn)其地位較“思想邏輯及條理性”可退居其次，從而印證了上述結(jié)論。第一條說(shuō)的是“思想性”，第二條說(shuō)的是“結(jié)構(gòu)性”，第三條說(shuō)的是“表達(dá)性”，從這里入手，我們就分別采取“各個(gè)擊破”的方法解剖GRE作文的本質(zhì)。
三、GRE作文的思想性(第一性)
原則一：準(zhǔn)確審題，全面回應(yīng)
很多考生往往對(duì)關(guān)乎自己作文命運(yùn)關(guān)鍵的部分卻不屑一顧，結(jié)果往往“下筆數(shù)百字，離題十萬(wàn)里”。時(shí)間對(duì)于考生來(lái)說(shuō)的的確確是個(gè)不可不考慮的重要環(huán)節(jié)，但是審題是一種好的“習(xí)慣”，是對(duì)應(yīng)試者基本素質(zhì)的考驗(yàn)，馬虎不得。后面我們會(huì)提到如何作文，就是如何“借題發(fā)揮”，如何“點(diǎn)到為止”，不經(jīng)過(guò)這道工序，是不可能“功成身退”的。之所以如此關(guān)注強(qiáng)調(diào)這點(diǎn)，一方面是因?yàn)橐坏芭茴}”(主要是在ISSUE中)，將接受ETSsevere的懲罰，被叛“0”分，同時(shí)也是因?yàn)檫@種現(xiàn)象很普遍，比如下面一篇來(lái)自網(wǎng)上的ISSUE作文就出現(xiàn)了這種“癥狀”。
注：病歷文章來(lái)自猴哥滿(mǎn)分網(wǎng)，范文主要就所討論之處作出示范，并非一定是什么“高分作文”，主要是silentwings的文章，所選話(huà)題均來(lái)自近半年來(lái)筆者等人在華東區(qū)考場(chǎng)實(shí)戰(zhàn)真題。
29."Public figures such as actors, politicians, and athletes should expect people to be interested in their private lives. When they seek a public role, they should expect that they will lose at least some of their privacy."
(病歷文)
Everyone has the right to keep his/her privacy, including the public figures. People have the nature to learn others' privacy, especially those of the celebrities for various reasons, such as reverance and curiousness, but it doesn't follow that they are entitled to pry others' private life, and it is really unfair to say that any public figure choose to expose his/her privacy by himself/herself as long as he/she seek a public role.
In the current days, it is a widely spread atmosphere that people take a strong interest in talking about the private life of celebrities, they even rival each other in the fact that who knows more about a common interested celebrity. To cater such a taste, more and more mass media try their best to collect each aspect of a public figure's private life with an interest even exceeding that of making known their work. When we read a entertainment paper or magazine, we are certain to find that most of the content are the private life of singers and stars, such as someone got a divorce with his/her ex-girlfried/ex-boyfriend and is now keeping contract with someone else, etc.
All that exists is not valid, we couldn't say that it is in reason to spy into others' privacy just because most people prefer to do so, and we should not just accept a unfair fact without exert any effort to change the circumstance. To put your own feet in the shoes of the public figures, do you feel comfortable to be watched everywhere you go, and find a lot of affair news about you in the media especially when most of the news are made out by the pressmen? If your answer to this question is no, you should agree that we are obliged to do something to change the current situation about the private lift of public figures. Special laws should be enacted to discipline the prying into privacy of the mass media, sound should be heared arguing again people's interest in celebrities' private life.
Only when the public figures are librated from the harassment of worrying about their privacy's protection, we can expect a better service from them, and in that case, more capable people will be attract to pursue a public role. Suppose that if a singer is followed everywhere he/she goes, how can he/she lead a normal life as common people, how can he/she gets a relaxation? He/she must be cautious when he/she every words, he/she can't expect a casual and relaxing atmosphere as every common people can enjoy. It is difficult for him/her to concentrate all their energy in working, as a consequence, we would lose some more brilliant performance we can expect otherwise.
In summary, we should call on the public to cease to spy into the celebrities' privacy and pay more attention to their public life, only in that way can the public figure enjoy their life better and can we expect a better service from them. (496 words)
評(píng)析：這篇文章的主要失誤來(lái)自作者未能仔細(xì)審題便下筆一蹴而就，題目所討論的對(duì)象明明是Public Figures,從頭到尾討論的主體居然成了Public，說(shuō)他們?nèi)绾稳绾侮P(guān)注明星隱私，說(shuō)他們?nèi)绾稳绾卧O(shè)身處地地為明星們著想，后總結(jié)說(shuō)是公眾應(yīng)還明星們于自由之軀，把一上來(lái)合理的“否定回應(yīng)”拋之腦后，從而導(dǎo)致文章“答非所問(wèn)”。考慮到文章一上來(lái)合理回應(yīng)，以及不錯(cuò)的語(yǔ)言表達(dá)，僅有幾處不起眼的拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤，應(yīng)判為“2分”(有嚴(yán)重錯(cuò)誤類(lèi)文章)。
在出示范文之前，我們就此題談?wù)劇皩忣}”和“回應(yīng)”這兩個(gè)基本問(wèn)題。
(1)審題的原則：“字斟句酌，明確對(duì)象”，我們讀題就是要弄懂題目要讓我們干什么，然后才能相應(yīng)知道該怎么干。GRE作文都是議論文，寫(xiě)議論文就好比“打仗”，知己知彼方能百戰(zhàn)不殆。這個(gè)題目不難讀懂，先翻譯如下：“公眾人物，例如演員、政治家和運(yùn)動(dòng)員等應(yīng)該預(yù)料到人們對(duì)他們私生活的關(guān)注。當(dāng)他們決定成為公眾角色時(shí)，他們應(yīng)該料到自己的一些隱私將被供之于眾?！憋@然，經(jīng)過(guò)審題，我們發(fā)現(xiàn)題目探討的是公眾人物“是否應(yīng)該”預(yù)料到自己隱私的暴光。話(huà)題將討論設(shè)定在這個(gè)范圍內(nèi)，同時(shí)給出了一個(gè)參考的見(jiàn)解，“他們當(dāng)然應(yīng)該知道”，并給出理由，“他們自己決定成為公眾人物”。整個(gè)話(huà)題是個(gè)“should”類(lèi)型的ISSUE(詳細(xì)分類(lèi)見(jiàn)后文)，前后句呈”因果關(guān)系“(執(zhí)果索因)。這才是完整的審題，才是完整正確把握文章的第一步。
(2)回應(yīng)的原則：“攻其一點(diǎn)，兼顧其余”。也就是說(shuō)，回應(yīng)要找準(zhǔn)重點(diǎn)，其余部分只須略微帶過(guò)，作到“回應(yīng)重點(diǎn)突出而全面”，這點(diǎn)在ISSUE和“ARGUMENT”中都是普遍適用的大前提原則，也是“高分作文”的要領(lǐng)之一。這里我們已經(jīng)知道作這篇文章要從“公眾人物”自身出發(fā)，以他們的角度來(lái)看待自己隱私是否該暴光的問(wèn)題，這樣我們就找到中心回應(yīng)點(diǎn)是“should expect”,對(duì)象是“public figures”,而例證可以充分利用話(huà)題的友好提示：列舉的三種人，選擇熟悉易于表達(dá)的來(lái)充實(shí)論證，免了自己的勞神工夫，這種資源一定要善加利用，一方面可充實(shí)論據(jù)，另一方面，作到了兼顧其他，全面回應(yīng)的原則。下面的范文采取AGREE的態(tài)度，采用should類(lèi)文章的清晰“套路”，作到了合理回應(yīng)，請(qǐng)讀者就這方面仔細(xì)分析。
(范文)
A million times I have heard the accident regarding a certain famous star shouted to separate fervid journalists and interviews from various media outside his or her door, which finally results a farce of quarrel and fight. Sometimes I really hate those drab reporters, who surprisingly have the endless power and fresh tricks to snatch almost each shadow of celebrities together with the innate ability to embellish them so "fascinating". At the same time those public figures shriek for their overexposure of privacy I am always pity for their embarrassment, for their career they really have no better choice but to tolerate, for their legitimate rights they had better struggle against the privacy revelation. But most of them, in the end, choose the former despite without any mustered negotiation.
It is obvious to take into mind that being a public cynosure the first thing one has to be even eager to sacrifice is the privacy, in that the quality of public is just the opposite of privacy, in the rim of relationship, either one can only be maintained. The fundamental aim for a celebrity is to stand strong in the sight of public and win over the precious approbation from his or her fans. So packing oneself in his single world can help nothing to add his reputation, what he strives to do is the reverse-anatomize oneself in front of the public stares and acclaim for his names being praised or criticized in the sun-then can he make himself known out of the nonplus of being forgotten and lose his prestige in public. As a result, the condition of privacy being traced and published is no more a paramount incidence but under the prediction of them; after all, no reports, no celebrities.
Hence, if a public figure intends to preserve his title, no grouch he ought to hang at lips, on the contrary, he might be thankful to these indefatigable journalists and reporters for their free propaganda of his talk and behavior pattern. Take the teenage star-backstreet boys for instance; with the sales of their albums skyrocket, their reputation is more and more stentorian, following the trend of their ordinary life becoming an incandescent focus attracting public eyes. Then as we all know, backstreet clothes have been prevalent, backstreet sneakers also is in heat sale, and personal parlance begins to appear some exotic features commonly shared by teenagers just because backstreet boys ever talked like that. A five-boy chorus can influence so many groups of people by what they said and what they did, the feeling of satisfaction and proud could be no better to describe their elation of success than for the byproducts of the privacy publicized, this time they probably even couldn't help to rush up to the media reporters and proffer their kisses.
Oh, well, to the scandals mostly reported in any entertainment channel, these figures ultimately reaches a top limitation of inured tolerance, especially those survive by their shingles of excellent prestige, such as those politicians. In the period of election of presidents or senators, the most headache those participants suffer is the side report, which has the overwhelming clout to remove his precious stake to his adversary's side. Then the only thing they must remember is the discretion of their words and behaviors either in public case or merely in private room. There is no absolute stalwart wall that can resist the strong blast, and the unique paper that can wrap the burning flame. According to this principle, the expectation for their privacy no longer staying for himself is no doubt fathomable to them, astonishment is just an effete struggle.
To sum up, being an illustrious man have to pay his privacy for the undertaking brilliance, and he should understand without the public desire to delve their everyday life instead of merely relying on their limited published works, they convincingly cannot earn such a lot from their maniac supporters, who also need them to care for and give enough regards as feedback. Once this complex relationship being disentangled, I think, the public figures and populace will make a balance on the scale of privacy revelation. (690 words)
在切實(shí)掌握好這些技巧之后，后續(xù)的問(wèn)題也會(huì)接踵而來(lái)，很多考生在認(rèn)識(shí)到問(wèn)題的嚴(yán)重性之后，不知道如何從開(kāi)始回應(yīng)起就把握好文章的走向而不跑題，作好條理性的框架是必須的，但是簡(jiǎn)便的方法就是(千萬(wàn)注意啊?。?！)——將話(huà)題的內(nèi)容編成問(wèn)句，自己的每段回應(yīng)編成回答，如果作到有問(wèn)必答，那么你就沒(méi)有跑題，否則就要重新構(gòu)思回到正軌上來(lái)。這個(gè)方法在備考初期研究題庫(kù)預(yù)先構(gòu)思時(shí)尤為重要，他能檢驗(yàn)?zāi)闾峋V的合理性，否則一旦到了考場(chǎng)，你來(lái)不及重新構(gòu)思而盲目照搬，后果不堪設(shè)想。希望這里的這點(diǎn)提醒能夠引起各位考生足夠的重視，不要白白無(wú)謂犧牲。
而這個(gè)問(wèn)題對(duì)于ARGUMENT來(lái)說(shuō)，情況要好得多，一方面由于ARGUMENT回應(yīng)方式比較固定且其較ISSUE來(lái)說(shuō)約定俗成的高度模式化，另一方面是由于ARGUMENT的易于操作性和熟悉性，利用的資源都來(lái)自題干本身，因而考生在這篇作文上很少看走眼。但是也有些題目，由于脫胎于ETS慣常的邏輯單題模式，本身語(yǔ)言饒口，且容易將論據(jù)與結(jié)論混淆，從而導(dǎo)致一定程度的攻擊失誤，雖然不至于像ISSUE那樣導(dǎo)致全盤(pán)失誤，但是畢竟在好拿分的項(xiàng)目上失分無(wú)疑是給原本脆弱的分?jǐn)?shù)雪上加霜。下面我們看一道在去年年末左右華東考場(chǎng)遇到的一道少見(jiàn)的ARGUMENT難題，難就難在對(duì)于論據(jù)和結(jié)論的辯識(shí)和推理上，還有就是邏輯謬誤不是像其他題目那樣明顯地向你揮手——“向我開(kāi)炮！??！”
142.The article entitled 'Eating Iron' in last month's issue of Eating for Health reported that a recent study found a correlation between high levels of iron in the diet and an increased risk of heart disease. Further, it is well established that there is a link between large amounts of red meat in the diet and heart disease, and red meat is high in iron. On the basis of the study and the well-established link between red meat and heart disease, we can conclude that the correlation between high iron levels and heart disease, then, is most probably a function of the correlation between red meat and heart disease.
析題：仔細(xì)讀過(guò)，發(fā)現(xiàn)這道題有點(diǎn)繞，很多考生曾經(jīng)有過(guò)這樣的困惑：“我沒(méi)有理解后一句話(huà)的意思is most probably a function of the correlation between red meat and heart disease.是說(shuō)high iron level于heart disease之間的關(guān)系是red meat與heart disease之間有關(guān)的結(jié)果那作者到底是認(rèn)為high iron level和heart disease之間有沒(méi)有關(guān)系阿？”再讀之下，我們會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)作者其實(shí)做了一個(gè)順接推論：red meat引起心臟病------------> red meat里面還有大量的鐵------------------> 高鐵引起心臟病，就是這么一個(gè)簡(jiǎn)單的推論過(guò)程，關(guān)鍵認(rèn)清誰(shuí)推出誰(shuí)，就要在審題時(shí)注意到關(guān)鍵的這么看似不經(jīng)意卻被友好的ETS“重復(fù)兩次”的短語(yǔ)“well established”，也就是說(shuō)“大量紅肉與心臟病之間一定有聯(lián)系”是不容質(zhì)疑的論據(jù)，即本題論據(jù)是不容批駁的，關(guān)鍵問(wèn)題在于由論據(jù)推導(dǎo)出結(jié)論的時(shí)候犯了“Implicit causal claims”和“gratuitous assumptions”(詳細(xì)邏輯謬誤分類(lèi)見(jiàn)后文“七宗罪”)，因而我們就可以以次展開(kāi)攻擊。很多來(lái)自網(wǎng)上的文章和提綱在本題上顛倒了推導(dǎo)對(duì)象，把“高鐵引起心臟病”作為論據(jù)來(lái)推出“red meat引起心臟病”，結(jié)果導(dǎo)致文章失誤。下面讀者可通過(guò)以下范文檢驗(yàn)一下該論證過(guò)程和思路：
(范文)
The correlation of the high irons level and heart disease the arguer trying to prove is not as perfect as he assumes. Although at first glance, his cause-and-effect analysis seems quite cogent, yet it can't stand much reexamination.
I agree to the well-established theory concerning the necessary relation between the large amount of red meat in people's diet and heart disease, but no other possibilities can be ruled out except for one of the ingredients-iron. It is obvious that the arguer constructs his building of conclusion on the basis of the conviction of the deleterious function stems from the iron. While not only a single iron does red meat contain, as we all know, many other components also have the influential role once being indigested into human body. For instance, some type of particular protein it might include, instead of the iron, is the substantial root of heart attack. So the arguer's peroration has no convincing power for this gratuitous assumption.
Moreover, even though his deduction does really derive from some passage of authoritative researches he has no opportunity to list below, the assertion about the high levels of iron related to the possibility of heart disease cannot be got through by merely so qualified the evidence exhibited here. According to the arguer's elicitation, we believe the red meat does contain large amount of iron, however, we might ask ourselves such questions enlightened by our common sense, "Does the amount of iron involved in red meat reach the dangerous level enough to lead to heart disease?" The answer we can't obtain through this short argument, thus directly make us doubt the whole fruits the arguer attained.
As it stands, the study reported on the published media Eating for Health is inevitable filled with some lethal logic fallacies, which finally weakens the cogency of the whole claims. To such a paramount and sensitive issue relative to people's health and life, scrutiny is not allowed to be neglected; and it is just for this point, I'm afraid, no people could ultimately abjure for eating red meat as a result of reading this ridiculous article. (352 words)