你寫我改:BEC評點(diǎn)網(wǎng)友作文(5)1

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本期作文題目:
    Formulate a smoking policy for your office which is fair to both smokers and nonsmokers. Write a 40-50 word memo informing all staff of the policy.
    老師提示:
    我們需要確定,如果我是公司職員,我要在這篇memo中獲得什么信息?是不是要知道:
    1.新的吸煙政策從什么時候開始;
    2.吸煙區(qū)劃定在什么地方?
    網(wǎng)友作文一:
    TO: All Employees   FROM: CEO, Willan Smith
    SUBJECT: NEW SMOKING POLICY
    For all the employees, especially smokers,[1] plz be aware that our company's new smoking policy has been formulated as follow: A main smoking area's going to be restricted before Next MONDAY[2], anyone is not allowed to smoker in non-smoking zone even in the washing room.[3]
    Plz target the smoking and non-smoking area and stick to the company's new policy.[4]
    Thx.
    _________________________________________
    [1]去掉,抬頭已經(jīng)寫過給所有的員工,所以直接從正文開始就行了,費(fèi)這個事干什么?
    [2]時間不確切,是 from next Monday. Before 這個期限是什么時候?如果不能給出確切信息,就不要說,還不如換成具體的吸煙區(qū)域更好: be restricted to the room next to the toilet.
    [3]你經(jīng)常在洗手間吸煙嗎?或者你們公司有這樣的同事?把這句話去掉。
    [4]添加:to ensure that it is fair to all of you.
    網(wǎng)友作文二:
    To: All staff
    From: Hope0068
    Everybody know that smoking is dangerous for your health. And the The studies didn't just point to the ill effects of smoking on those who smoke--non-smokers, too. [1] Notice is hereby given that the smoking area is located in the special corner[2] of the first floor of this building. This come into force on[3] September 15th.
    Thanks.來源:考試大
    _________________________________________
    [1]Memo 的主要作用就是提醒同事們注意事項(xiàng),這和吸煙有多有害不相干,去掉。改為:to assure working environment
    [2]一般的公司都應(yīng)該給個room
    [3]from